“Ah! I figured you’d be here!” says a familiar voice.
On a wooden bench facing the pond sits the trucker.
“What else would a croc be doing in the industrial district? Battling forklifts? Chocking two trailers at once? Nah,” he says. “Figured even if you are the Hooks croc, you’d probably be out here looking for water.”
The lemony-persimmon scent is strong, but another smell radiates out, something Big Sal hasn’t smelled in a long time. Of all the humans he’s met, Wade’s clean-swamp scent is the most relaxing. It brings a feeling of safety, and even a hint of adventure. His old adventure, the one that brought him from Stinkwater to Hooks.
“You’re the guy who drives a big truck,” says Big Sal. He swims to the shore and, shaking himself free of water, sits down on the bench next to the man.
“Haha, yes, guilty as charged. Name’s Wade. Been driving for Molly’s Long Haul for twenty-some-odd years. It pays the bills, keeps the heat on, and gives me a few adventures along the way. You don’t look so good. Is life getting in your way, or are you in the way of life?”
A green-headed mallard paddles out from the reeds and cattails. It catches Big Sal’s attention. He watches it, seeing it as a colorful animal, minding its own business and just looking for water bugs.
Things were simpler back then. Before all this.
He hunches over his clasped hands.
“I heard that my old home, the one I left, is all gone. And now that Raleigh took my key, I don’t have anywhere to go. I thought things were good. There at Hooks. But now I don’t think I know anything. I just woke up, but I’m tired. So tired.” He sighs.
And as he says this, dust rubs loose from his hands and drifts to the ground. He watches it, and a thought crosses his mind.
“Sounds like life is getting in your way,” says Wade. “I’m sorry to hear that about your old home, my man. Sometimes we go through things we can’t make sense of. The world keeps moving around us, but it feels like we’re watching everyone else and only passing through.”
Big Sal’s thought vanishes. The memory of crossing the street after Raven’s Mirage rises in its place.
“Exactly!” he says. And then, quieter and more to himself, he asks, “Why am I here?”
“I don’t know, man,” says Wade, also quiet. “I don’t think many of us truly know. I suppose that’s part of what life is.”
“I think...I miss being around all this. The pond, the birds, the changing sky—this is me. I mean, I loved the attention at Hooks. But this is where I came from. It’s not what I left, that’s different. That’s so different.”
“Yeah, I think I know what you’re getting at. People can be great. Sometimes not so much. But being outside things can often just be easier. Less stressful. Less drama. Nature has its own flow.”
Cilantro seeps from Wade, disappearing into the green of the trees and grass and cattails.
Wade takes a deep breath and holds it. He gently nods four times and breathes out.
“Ahh. It’s what I do when things get too overwhelming. Breathe with me, brother. When we can’t fix everything, and things are all broken on the outside and on the inside, keep it simple, silly. Find a quiet place. And breathe.”
Big Sal doesn’t think Wade understands what he is trying to say, but he shrugs.
“Alright,” he says. He takes a quick breath and lets it out just as fast.
“Slow down, slow down, man. You gotta let that oxygen get into your bloodstream, let that mammalian heart rate come down.”
“Uhm. Ok.”
Big Sal tries again, this time doing it much slower. It doesn’t fix things, but it does help settle the tired feelings.
“There you go. Keep doing that and you’ve got it.”
He does it several more times. The pressure holding him tight inside his body releases, and there is suddenly more of him inside. A lot more.
“Wow. That... did something. I’m not sure what.”
“See? That’s what I’m sayin’. Now, what was it you were saying about not having a place?”
Big Sal sighs and watches more dust drift down from his scaly skin. This time, Wade notices.
“Man, you gotta take that suit off and get a good cleanin’ done.”
“I... I’m not sure. I... I think this is... something normal. I’ve done this before. I think.”
“Mmkay.” Wade gestures to the proximity band on Big Sal’s left wrist. “What’s that thing?”
“Raleigh gave it to me. It tells me when to dance at Hooks.”
“Guy takes your key, but doesn’t take that thing? Man, I don’t think Hooks is done with you.”
“Well, last night I slept out here. The night before, I slept at Hooks, but they said I couldn’t stay there long. So, I went and got all that stuff Petra told me I needed, like a bank account and a cell phone. Normal human stuff, I guess. And then I hung onto an old crocodile skin that I was told to hang onto, but found out later I was supposed to leave at Hooks. Raleigh didn’t like that. I don’t know why he got so mad. Humans are so confusing…”
Wade chuckles at this.
“And so now I don’t have any way of getting a place to stay. And why are you laughing? I’m…I’m trying to be serious here.”
Wade smiles, clears his throat and shifts. “Sorry, you’re right. Go on.”
“I don’t know. I guess that’s it.”
“So let me get this straight. You got normal human stuff. Bank account. Cell phone. That’s more than plenty of humans start with, man.”
No scent indicates that he’s joking. Big Sal looks at Wade to make sure.
“Really?”
“You bet your butt. It takes time for people to get this stuff. Gotta be old enough for this stuff. Gotta have money to put into the bank account.”
“I…didn’t know.”
“So you got money in that account?”
“Yeah. Something about a signing bonus from Hooks.”
Wade looks away and shakes his head. “Man, so you need a place, and you got money. You’re ten times farther along than I was when I was your age.”
“I…how old am I?”
Wade gives him a look. “Man, you could be twelve years or twelve thousand years. I dunno.” He thinks for a moment. “I’m guessing you went to Raven’s Mirage to get ID if you opened an account. Check your ID.”
“How’d you know that?”
“Ankerton, man. It’s a weird place, but the weirdness has a consistency to it. Just know that Doctor Crow doesn’t decide who you are. You do. He just gives Ankerton enough to work with while you figure that out. If he signed off on your ID, whatever’s there is good enough for Ankerton.”
“My purse—it’s over there.”
Big Sal stands and retrieves it from under the tree.
“Man, you shouldn’t be leaving things like that lying around. You’re lucky it’s still there,” says Wade.
“What do you mean?”
“Theft. Someone could come along and take it.”
“People do that?”
Wade’s smile thins and he shakes his head. “You’re lucky you got the wicked suit, man. No one’s gonna challenge you.”
“What?”
Wade sits forward and puts his hands over his face. “Don’t worry about it.”
Big Sal opens his purse. His phone, wallet, the map, and the prepaid card fall out.
“I like your wallet. Cute fox,” says Wade.
“Yeah. I miss him.”
Wade nods but doesn’t ask.
Big Sal slides out the ID. The crocodile in the hologram has become cloudy. He shifts the card, and something else begins to emerge: a curved silhouette without much definition.
“I don’t get these holograms.”
“No one really does. They’re a mystery.”
“So how do I tell…”
“Right there,” Wade says, pointing. “DOB: TBD. Huh.”
“What’s that mean?”
“DOB is date of birth. TBD is to be determined. Huh. Like I said. A mystery.”
Big Sal shakes his head. “How do I know how much money I have?”
“Well, just open the bank app, pair the card and log in.”
“I don’t know what that means,” says Big Sal, tapping buttons on his phone. “And now the phone doesn’t work.”
“Um, did you turn it off?”
“I don’t know.”
“Here, push this button on the side…” Wade reaches over and shows him the button.
“I thought that just made the ding stop.”
“Well, yeah—quiet and off.”
The phone powers up, the logo spinning.
“Yo, that phone is voice-controlled. One of those new models with old-style buttons. So cool.”
“It’s a phone. For a croc. I don’t know why I need it yet. I don’t take pictures.”
Wade watches the mallard paddle between cattails at the pond’s edge. “Well, they’re supposed to help us communicate with each other. Talk. Text. Video chat.”
The phone finishes its boot process and sits idle for a moment.
“What do I do?” asks Big Sal.
“See the microphone button? Push that.”
Big Sal pushes it. The phone makes a soft chime.
“Now tell it to open your bank account,” says Wade.
“Open your bank account.”
A voice from the phone asks him to press his bank card against the back. Wade helps him follow the unfamiliar instructions. Soon, the account appears on the screen.
“Do you need me to tell you how much money you have?” asks Wade.
“Yes.”
Wade leans in and whistles. “Wow. That’s what’s left of a signing bonus? You could buy a car with that.”
“So… I can get a place?”
“You’ve got more than enough to get started. I guess the question is, do you want to live by yourself, or with other people?”
Big Sal doesn’t hesitate.
“With others.”
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Chapter 30 podcast drops September 5
Chapter 31 text drops August 12
